Lesson 1 I learned to use the 3rd inner part of the 3rd finger.
Lesson 2 I was told to make a hole in between that would allow another stick to slip through, so I had to use the 2nd inner part instead to make way.
And then there was no further comment on that except to keep practicing and improving.
Until today. Lesson 5 & 6 (because I missed one and had replacement).
We spent maybe 5 minutes on the position.
11 o'clock to the bass drum. Everything has to be reachable in place.
Apparently using the 2nd inner part leaves me with less room to bounce the stick.
So it was back to the first handling. Which gives me cramp from lack of use.
Then my fingers were too stiff, I was holding it too hard, and so on and so forth.
I was upset. It seemed like I wasn't getting things right no matter how I tried.
To sum it all up, I was warned it's the years of holding it wrongly that is messing me up right now.
And if I don't get it down correctly, I won't be able to go far.
But I don't even remember how I held it all these years.
No one ever mentioned what was the right way.
At the end he realized maybe the problem wasn't the thumb and where it landed on the middle finger, but the rest of my fingers blocking the way.
I acknowledged it could be because I am used to curling everything up for the piano.
We even checked out my flexibility on the piano. *eye rolls*
This is suppose to fix all the wrongs.
It's suppose to be fun.
But putting that leap in the heart when I hear someone play a beat I like, into my own playing is...hard.
It's harder to overcome that feeling of failure than I thought it would be.